glorious pen. sacrificed for the greater good.

ryan goes into the bathroom. then he comes out. i hear no flush.


rachel: did you pee?

ryan: the toilet...won't flush. i think the thing disconnected.


we go back into the bathroom to inspect the toilet. we look down into an abyss of nastiness.


rachel: isn't this supposed to be clean water?

ryan: well, it's not.

(thank you for that brilliant scientific observation)


ryan refuses to stick his hand into the water to grab the chain.


(delicate little flower, but i love him anyway)


after teasing him incessantly, i offer to put my hand in the water.


ryan: well i don't want you to do that either!! we need to get something to grab it with. hold on, i have notions.

rachel: don't even think about using silverware!

ryan:  that is not one of my notions.

rachel: well what then?? nothing we ever have to use again!!


ryan searches through the junk drawer and pulls out a green pen.


ryan: are you attached to this pen?

rachel: well, i like the green.


silence. blank stare.


rachel: let me find a different pen.


i go into the office and grab a pen i am willing to part with. i hand it to ryan.


ryan: this is a nice pen.

rachel: well, fine. here, i have a whole box of pens. i'm sure we can find one in here.

ryan: well, look at you with all your markers and stuff.

(another brilliant scientific observation)


after much searching, i find a simple black bic that i believe will do the job quite nicely. ryan agrees.

ryan puts a baggie on his hand and attempts to grab the chain with the bic.

meanwhile (being the loving, encouraging girlfriend that i am), i laugh hysterically at his failed attempts.


rachel: just touch the damn water!!


finally, ryan allows his hand to touch the water a tiny bit. he succeeds.






and to what to we owe this crisis abatement and magnificent achievement?

true love. and a very brave pen.